Where in the World is Reese?

If you guessed Connecticut and Upstate New York you would be right.


I went on a trip with a massive amount of family and friends to the Northeast for the past several days. The trip was a blast and I even met a cute boy who I spent most of the trip with.


Too bad we’re semi-related and nothing can ever happen because of it.


I’m really bitter about that too. He should have told me that my Great Aunt married his Great Uncle. But, no, he had to pretend that there was no relation. And, then he kept saying “There’s no blood between us! We’re related only through a marriage!” But, I won’t fall for his slick reasoning. We’re related, so I’m steering clear.


Anyways, on the way back home, we stopped at a couple of malls and went shopping. Of course, now that I’m on my thrift fast until Lil’ Kim is released from prison, I went all out and spent what little money I had left in my savings account (aka my wallet).

One of the malls we went to was in New Jersey. It was an outlet mall called Jersey Gardens or something. While there, I witnessed acts so horrible and horrific that they’re just too horrendous to repeat here on this blog. But, for the good of all women who live in New Jersey, I do have this little tidbit of information that I believe will make a difference in their lives…


WOMEN OF NEW JERSEY: PLEASE LEARN HOW TO DRESS!!!


I don’t say this to hurt your feelings, but you need to know that the way you dress is absolutely and terribly disgusting.


I’m sorry, I know that’s harsh, but not every cute little Britney Spears outfit looks good on every body. Unless your tummy is flat and booty is acceptably round, there is no reason…


Let me repeat…


NO REASON!!!


…to wear halter tops that cut off at your boobies, which, incidentally seem to hang down to your navel, along with low-rider jean shorts that show off your Frederick’s of Hollywood thong. This is especially true when you are toting around your 3 & 5 year old daughters!!!


Please, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, take a lesson from your hip NYC and preppy Connecticut neighbors. You can look good even when you cover up. I promise you, this is true.


PLEASE BELIEVE ME!!!


Yea, so that’s basically where I’ve been all this time. Unfortunately, I wasn’t kidnapped by Brad Pitt, but I did have some fun with some family and friends.


So, umm, there’s a potential to have quite a few blog postings this week. I understand I’ve been tagged (I’m working on it Dez!), so that’s coming up. Also, my observations from the Teena Marie/Vivian Green concert I went to last week, I’ll try to post that this week. And, maybe, if we’re all lucky and bow down on the ground that I walk on, I might put mind to pen to paper for a little Dysfunctional Relationship that’s been missing for about a month.


No promises, but we’ll see.


Oh, and I noticed that quite a few people have taken my quiz. Or, maybe one person took it over and over again, but anyways, I just wanted to give a shout-out to all of my secret blog readers.



I see you. You can’t escape from my view!!



MU-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!



Just kidding, of course.


Or am I?


MU-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!



Yes, it’s true, I have lost my mind.


Here’s the latest scoreboard for my quiz.


Peace and Chicken Grease!!




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