Friday, January 13, 2006

Inspiring the Future

Child: “What’s your name?”

Reese: “Reese.”

Child: “What do you do?”

Reese: “I’m an attorney.”

Child: “Oh, you’re a lawyer?”

Reese: “No, I’m an attorney.”

Child: “What’s the difference?”

Reese: “Allegedly, “attorneys” have bar licenses and “lawyers” just have Jurist Doctorate’s.”

Child: [silence]

Reese: “‘Attorney’ just sounds better.”

Child: “What kind of law do you do?”

Reese: “I work for the government.”


Reese: “No, I turned them down.”

Child: “REALLY?!?!”

Reese: “Well…yes and no…”

Child: “Which is it- yes or no?”

Reese: “I’m not really allowed to discuss it.”

Child: “Oh, I see.”

Reese: “My friend LQ almost worked for them though.”

Child: “REALLY?!?!”

Reese: “Well, I’m not really allowed to discuss it.”

Child: “Oh, okay.”

“So, what do you do at your job?”

Reese: “Well, people in America need lots of help from the government. Especially old people…”

Child: “So, you help them?”

Reese: “Oh, lord no! I’m an attorney, remember?”

Child: “So you mess with them?”

Reese: “Only sometimes- usually when they don’t follow the rules.”

Child: “I’m confused.”

Reese: “I try to help the people who really help the people.”

Child: “That doesn’t make any sense.”

Reese: “It’s the government, honey. It’s not supposed too.”

Child: “Do you like your job?”

Reese: “Yeah, it’s alright. It pays the bills.”

Child: “Do you make a lot of money?”

Reese: “I make [insert an amount of money that’s not a lot of money at all].”


Reese: “No, I’m a thousandaire.”

Child: “You’re silly! There is no such thing!”

Reese: “And there’s not such thing as a “millionaire Reese” either.”

Child: “When I grow up, I’m gonna be an attorney just like you.”

Reese: “No, don’t do it.”

Child [ignoring Reese]: “But, I’m going to help everyone!!!”

Reese: “The law will suck out your soul…”

Child [still ignoring Reese]: “And, I’m going to be rich just like you!!!”

Reese: “…and leave you a soulless, jaded vampire…”

Child [in la la lawyer land]: “I can’t wait to go to law school!!!”

Reese: “…a vampire who feeds off of the misery of others, I might add…”

Child: “Thank you, Reese. Now I know I can be anything!!!”

Reese: “…you’d make a lot more money doing hair weaves for celebrities…”

Child: “Me. Attorney at Law. That’s how you say it, right?"

Reese: “How about, you- ‘Hair Weaver to the Stars?’”

Child: “Hahahahahaha!!!! Nope, I’m going to be an attorney. A great one just like you.”

Reese: “Well…I am pretty great.”

Child: “I know!”

Reese: “Alright, kid. You go be an attorney. Knock yourself out.”

Child: “YEAH!!!”

Reese: “I mean that literally- knock yourself out and forget about being an attorney.”

Child: “Hahahahahaha!!! You’re funny!”

Reese: “No, the funny thing is- I wasn’t trying to be.”

Child: “Huh?”

Reese [rolling her eyes]: “Never mind.”

© Copyright 2005. All Rights Reserved.


Blogger "Lisa" said...

Hey Being an attorney is cool!
Don't steer the children away from it.

P.S. Is that attorney lawyer meaning real. I never knew that. And I'm an attorney.

10:48 AM  
Blogger Karla said...

LMAO, that reminds me of this dream i had the other day.

8:25 PM  
Blogger This Girl I Used to Know said...

Don't worry, my niece, currently in school for veterinary medicine, wanted to be a lawyer from the time she was in the 7th grade or so, right up through most of high school.

She wanted to be a lawyer so she could become president and fire congress.

After she found out that the president can't fire congress (which took a surprisingly long time to convince her of) the whole lawyer thing kind of went by the wayside.

Of course, I personally see nothing wrong with being a lawyer, but I never had to sit through law school either :)

10:45 AM  
Blogger ant said...

I couldn't help but smile at this post. It's the same thing someone in Law told me years ago when I decided I wanted to go to Law School someday.

Nonetheless, I still want to go into Law. Not because I want to help out the innocent (that's so cliche, no?) since Law isn't black and white. I want to for other reasons that I won't get into here.

Loved the post. Keep on giving out that great advice! Heh.

3:47 PM  
Blogger Reese The Law Girl said...

"Lisa": That's what I heard. I don't know if the attorney-lawyer qualifications thing is true though.

Karla: If you're having dreams about the law, those technically count as nightmares. ;)

Girlie: LOL! Fire Congress! Why haven't more people come up with that idea? It's brilliant! ;)

Antoine: Thanx for stopping by! I guess if you've been forewarned about the law, and you still want to do it, then more power to you. It's really not that bad. Just soul-crushing is all. ;)

9:50 AM  
Blogger Bobo the Wandering Pallbearer said...

For future reference, here's the proper calculus for explaining to children why it's better to be a vet than a lawyer:

1. Doctors are smarter than lawyers.

2. Veterinarians are smarter than doctors (animals don't sue).

3. Therefore, the smartest people would rather be faced with the prospect of shoving an arm up a horse's tuchas, to the shoulder, than deal with the law.


10:49 AM  
Blogger Reese The Law Girl said...

Bobo: Hey, I resent that! Sure doctors can do math, but so can a calculator.

But, lawyers can crush doctors, make just as much money as them (not this lawyer mind you), and only have to go through school in half the time.

So, Ha!

But, I agree vets are smarter than all of us. ;)

11:10 AM  
Blogger Amadeo said...

You obviously "luh da kids". You should have said become a consultant all those guys do is tell you what you should do and get paid a hundreds or more per hour.

11:39 AM  

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