Monday, November 21, 2005

Procrastinate with Me (I Don't Feel Like Packing)

I just want to take this moment to say that I hate Maryland Basketball.

You know, I was getting all hyped that this team would be way better than last year's. And what did they go do? They went and lost to Gonzaga tonight. Those stupid buggers couldn't even beat Gonzaga! And Gonzaga sucks (okay, they're ranked #9 in the country, but I still think they suck).

I mean, I ask for one little thing. One little thing! Is perfection really that much to ask for? I mean, really?


In other news, I just found out my mother has been lying to me my whole life. It's true. We just had this conversation today...

Reese: “Mom, remember that game, “Memory?” The one with all the cards with pictures on them? And you had to match each card with its identical, partner card?”

Mom: “Yea, I remember we used to play that all the time when you were about 4 or 5.”

Reese: “Yea, and I used to beat you at it all the time. Anyways, I was wondering- did you let me win all those times?”

Mom: “Of course. You didn’t think a 5 year old could beat a 27 year old woman did you?”

Reese: “Mom, I can’t believe you let me win!”

Mom: “You mean all these years you actually thought you beat me at Memory?”

Reese: “Well, I never really thought about it until yesterday...”

Mom: “Because I could whoop you at Memory right now if you wanted to test me.”

Reese: “Mom, I do not want to play Memory against you.”

Mom: “I’ll take you, you know.”

Reese: “Mom!”

Mom: “You know it was your Father that insisted that I let you win. He was all, “You know you have to let her win. It builds her confidence up.” Like I’m dumb enough to let my 5 year old lose repeatedly at Memory.”

Reese: “Okay, Mom.”

Mom: “You weren’t very good at it, by the way.”

Reese: “Mom!”

Mom: “Oh, you were so excited to win. “Ohhhh, I won, AGAIN!” That used to get on my nerves.”

Reese [laughing]: “Mom!”

Mom: “Eventually, I couldn’t stand it anymore. So, I started beating you. The way I saw it, you needed to learn some disappointment. But, then you used to get mad because you didn’t win. And then you started twisting the rules to say that I was cheating.”

Reese: “I don’t remember that.”

Mom: “Yea, well I remember. So, I let you win a few more times and then I put Memory away forever.”

Reese: “I can’t believe it. All this time and you just let me think I was smart. You lied to me!!”

Mom: “Yea, well, it paid off. Because of my questionable parenting, you believed you were smart enough to do anything.”

Reese: “Yea, I guess that’s true.”

Mom: “But, you ain’t no good at Memory.”

Reese: “Well, thanks for tearing down my confidence in my late twenties, Mom.”

Mom: “Hey, I’m just saying. Short-term memory is not your strongest suit.”

Reese: “Okay, goodbye now, Mom.”

Mom [under her breath]: “I mean will you even remember this conversation after I hang up the phone?"

Reese: “Mom!”

Mom: "Sometimes, I'm surprised you even remember I exist.”

Reese: “Mom!”

Mom: “I mean, your memory is bad.”

Reese: “I guess that's why I forget to NEVER ASK YOU THINGS!!”

Mom: "Well, yeah, it's because of your awful memory."

Reese: "Goodbye, Mom!"

In other, other news tomorrow I'm going to be a bad person and screw some old people over. That'll teach Maryland to lose a basketball game. Now the old people must suffer!

Just when I started making some progress, I return to the darkside.

Okay, I'm going to actually go pack now as I have nothing else to say.

Okay, I do have one more thing to say: Orlando Bloom was ROBBED of "Sexiest Man Alive." We all know it! Shame on People magazine. Shame!

Okay, that's it.

I'm really going to go pack now.

I'm gonna do it! Geesh, give me a break!

© Copyright 2005. All Rights Reserved.


Blogger derek said...

Go....pack ;-)

10:11 AM  
Blogger Reese The Law Girl said...

You'll be happy to know that not only did I pack, but I was able to pack everything into a carry-on so I don't have to check any luggage.

See, I can be organized and task-oriented. ;)

10:24 AM  
Blogger Robyn said...

I am having a vision of this exact conversation in 20 years between my husband and my son. My husband doesn't dick around with games.

1:35 PM  
Blogger This Girl I Used to Know said...

Aha, now I see what I missed by having sisters to play these games with rather than my Mom.

Sisters won't let you win, but at least there's no late-onset trauma from the lying.

8:52 AM  
Blogger "Lisa" said...

Dude you memory is just trash

5:28 PM  
Blogger Brother Kojak said...

Maryland doesn't suck...yet. If they loose to Miami or Florida State, they mos def suck.

And Orlando Bloom didnt get robbed. Ever since I've started reading this blog, I've asked women "is Orlando Bloom hot?" Unfortunately, as seems for you most of the time, you are alone in the forest with no ax. **smile**

11:42 AM  
Blogger Reese The Law Girl said...

BK: There's no accounting for taste. I can't help it if all the women you know are lesbians. ;)

3:05 PM  
Blogger tannia g. robles said...

hope your having a great time! you know what's funny is last week I was playing connect four with my boyfriends 10 year old niece and he told me to let her win. I was like hell no! She needs to learn to deal with not always winning, life is often more than none a disapointment. After years of people letting her win, she finally got a taste of disapointment. Leave it to me to be the bad one that crashes peoples dreams. LOL

3:14 PM  
Blogger derek said...

My son's mom doesn't want to play Scrabble with me for a similar reason. She wants me to let her use the dictonary. The rules state that dictionaries are for challenges only.

I won't let my son win in games like that...if he can't play by the rules, he can't play. In athletics, I will try to deemphasize competition because of the physical disparity but mental games, I will encourage him to try his matter what the score, he's a winner for busting his butt.

Eventually, his moral victories will be complimented by winning and he will be mentally tough enough to handle victory and defeat.


I just wanted an excuse to hug Reese :-).

2:25 PM  
Blogger Reese The Law Girl said...

Dang! Tannia and Derek are hardcore. Remind me to keep "Future Reese's" "would be, but most likely never to be born" kids away from you.

PS: Reese welcomes hugs. :)

7:27 PM  
Blogger Karla said...

Shame on People indeed. I don't know what is wrong with them but umm where was Daddy Yankee? i mean really am i going to have to make a papi chulo list part 4?

5:15 PM  

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